In case you aren't a regular reader of WCFC (in which case, you're a weirdo), the slut who runs that site has found and shared a great link to the web's greatest Venn diagrams. She already posted the best one, but here's my personal fave:
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Archives
- November 1, 2009 - November 7, 2009
- October 25, 2009 - October 31, 2009
- October 18, 2009 - October 24, 2009
- October 11, 2009 - October 17, 2009
- October 4, 2009 - October 10, 2009
- September 27, 2009 - October 3, 2009
- September 20, 2009 - September 26, 2009
- September 13, 2009 - September 19, 2009
- September 6, 2009 - September 12, 2009
- August 30, 2009 - September 5, 2009
06 November 2009
05 November 2009
My County's Latest Tragedy
When I got home from class tonight, my Facebook feed was buzzing in a way that most of yours probably weren't (unless you happen to be linked with multiple people I grew up with). This afternoon's shooting rampage happened in my home county, making it our second-deadliest massacre in less than 20 years. While I feel especially lucky and grateful that neither happened in my hometown, it still strikes close to home. I don't want to make what is a large-scale tragedy all about me... it's just that not to acknowledge it here would seem, to me, somehow neglectful or indifferent.
02 November 2009
Facebook Tips for the Politically-Incorrect
Ya know how, when friends of yours get tagged in the photos albums of people whom you aren't friends with, you can still see all the photos in that other person's album? Word to the not-so-wise: try to think ahead to your first job interview before uploading all of your photos. Check out this gem I just stumbled across...
Offend much? Am I overreacting, or wouldn't the Halloween costume on the right (unfortunately, he was tagged only as "Lil Wayne") constitute blackface anywhere else in the country? With regard to church attendance, it has often been said that 11:00am is the most segregated hour in the American week. In our town, it appears that downtown on a Friday night would be an equally segregated time of the week. Otherwise, this colostomy bag (or rather, the contents of one) would have gotten his ass kicked on the streets of one of America's twelve "coolest college towns."
I realize that, when we're 19 or 20 years old, we don't always make the smartest decisions (I certainly didn't... check out my GPA, or my Valtrex prescription). Even at my own extremely liberal undergraduate institution, fraternities were frequently in trouble for this kind of stupidity. I also realize that, typically, our state is about a quarter of a century behind the rest of the country when it comes to national trends. But come on. Really??? Who still thinks it's okay to do this on a public sidewalk in 2009? Obviously, some undergrads where I teach still do. Luckily, the cheerful young woman rubbing up on the colostomy bag was tagged by name. And I'll be saving this picture, just waiting, in case she ever runs for public office.
29 October 2009
28 October 2009
2004 Flashback: A Year in the Life of the Pickle
That Whitney Biennial where I first saw Julie Mehretu's work got me thinking about 2004. I remember it as a year in which I was actively happy (God, how could I have not been... I looked amazing!) whereas, these days, I guess I would say that I'm content more than rapturous. So, I dug out photo albums for a trip down Memory Lane.
In the life of Sweet Pickles, 2004 was the year...
- of my first-ever trip to NYC (the first of many art-related travels with L-Ant).
- that my godson was born which, as with the birth of his sister, and in the words of Michael K, made me feel feelings in my heart.
- of the surprise blowout Sister Pickles and I threw for our parents' 40th wedding anniversary.
- of my first Thanksgiving away from home (i.e., the whiskey-sours Thanksgiving at G-Wrobe's).
- that I started looking really hot (the modeling contracts didn't start rolling in until 2005).
Things that were a regular part of my life that I really miss:
- dinner parties at J-Klo's house
- $105 per week to meet with a trainer every MWF
- tanning beds
- vanilla vodka
- Sue, the best cleaning lady I ever had
- T-Lev's house in the Valley
- theme parties at G-Wrobe's house (e.g., the Monochromatic Party)
- parties at my own house (e.g., the Okonomiyaki Party, my first Annual 29th Birthday Party)
- Student Art Association functions (Flashback Prom, Halloween Party)
- HYFA happy-hours at the Long Shot
- the book club that met in the coffee shop on campus
- Old Chem 402, my penthouse office for my first 5 years here
- working with M-Add every day
- slutty dancing with A-Mar every time the song "Butterfly" came on at a party
People who were here then that I miss now:
J-Klo, the Housleys, Yankee Librarian, the Navalinksys, Christiane G., Christelle F., Elizabeth and Andrew, Lisa R., Jen A., Helene S., and more
People who are still here that I wish I saw more of these days:
the Dales, Dr. Oh, T-Lev, G-Wrobe, Joanna F., Kao-chan, Angela H., Gin & Ash, Yunhee, Charles B., and more
People who are still here that I wish would leave:
Frosty (apparently), the Bald Dwarf, and her girlfriend (president of the Pentecostal Hair Club for Women)What's on TV right now.
Art:21 on PBS. Specifically, a new episode I've never seen, titled Systems and featuring my favorite artist of the past decade who works in two dimensions, Julie Mehretu! At the 2004 Whitney Biennial, her work (a sample below) totally sucked me in and consumed a lot of my time (in a good way). If my #1 dream job (rich patron and career-making collector à la Charles Saatchi), #2 dream job (director of the Metropolitan Museum of Art à la Philippe de Montebello), or #3 dream job (architecture critic for the New York Times à la Ada Louise Huxtable) never materializes, my #4 dream job would be the gallerist representing Julie Mehretu!
Empirical Construction. 2003. Acrylic and ink on canvas, 9'8" x 14'7"
27 October 2009
Sweet Pickles is her #1 Fan!
Earlier this morning, Mama Pickles forwarded me an email. You know how Sweet Pickles feels about that. However, this one included a series of photographs of my all-time favorite head of state with all the heads of state of my own country during the past half century! For some reason, I couldn't get the attached images from the email, but was able to find most of them elsewhere online. Of course, she wasn't yet queen while Truman was president, and I don't know why there were no images of her with President Johnson. For those of us who are part of the Saxon Diaspora (doesn't that sound sweeter than "British imperialists"?) but not part of the Commonwealth, she's kinda ours too!
Looking online to try to reassemble these images, I stumbled across this gem (below), which would quadruple iPod sales if Apple knew what was good for them:
21 October 2009
20 October 2009
Ya know what I love?
Myself! Am I the most awesome instructor ever, or WHAT?!?! But my real love is international students. Today (the first Tuesday or Thursday on which it wasn't flooding during the past six weeks), I took one of my classes downtown to execute their 'Free Hugs' experiment. Every Tuesday and Thursday, they were always disappointed that we'd have to postpone because of the crappy weather, but in the van on the way downtown this afternoon, I could tell they were all nervous. Riding shotgun, up front next to the driver, I sounded like my mother... "You'll do fine. Everyone will love you. You'll have a great time." And they did. They totally got into it, and didn't want to leave when it was time to return to campus. I told them, "Damn! Y'all sure do love hugging strangers!" I was so proud of them! I can't wait to read their reports. Check out the rest of the pics (including the "awww-inspiring" action shots) on my Facebook page. We are the world, bitches! P.S. - Have I used enough exclamation points in this post?
Calling All Sluts!
Are y'all ready for this? Sweet Pickles just confirmed his booking at The Lyric for his 30th birthday party. On Saturday 12-Dec., it's gonna get krunk! Start planning now. For Sweet Pickles' out-of-town readers, start making your travel arrangements today. For you local sluts,what pair of your luckiest underwear will you wear, what taxi service will you use, where can you score some X, who will you call to bail you out of jail?
19 October 2009
18 October 2009
My New Favorite Thing
Minestrone! Sweet Pickles just made a bigass pot of it. And it was easy! Preparation and cooking time = less than 15 minutes altogether. And there's a lot of it, so I'll be able to enjoy some for the next several days. Considering the ingredients, it strikes me as both low-cal and healthy (the former the more important). It tasted great, and I am pleasantly surprised by how filling one bowl was! Now, I need a nap.
17 October 2009
16 October 2009
14 October 2009
The best part...
about Sweet Pickles' faculty exchange happening in summer instead of spring? These sluts will be back in town for the Film Festival! It has been eight and a half months since the Texas Women Art Travelers re-packed their SUV and drove away from my house, back to the Promised Land, without me. That means... less than 4 months until the TWAT rolls back in to town again!
Guess what this weekend is!
Misty-Water-Colored Memory of the Way We Were: One Friday each October, back when George H. W. Bush was president, we always skipped classes to caravan up I-35 to Big D for the annual UT-OU game. Although we never got tickets to go inside the Cotton Bowl, we still made the migration every year for the par-tay, and about 15 of us would stay the weekend in a friend's 2-bedroom/1-bath apartment across from the SMU campus. One year, we decided that we needed something more special than the usual "Hook 'Em" or "Go, 'Horns" to shoe-polish on the back window of K-Bor's car for the ride north, but couldn't figure out what we should write. That genius T-Bagg proposed: "Dallas-Bound and 'Horny" (and we made the 'o' in Horny in the iconic shape of Bevo's head). On the highway, we got more complimentary beer passed to us from the open windows of other fans' speeding cars than we knew what to do with!
The Pointer Sisters and I are so excited, and we just can't hide it!
I don't want to jinx myself, but after this afternoon's conference call to Quito, it's looking like your favorite slut is bound for the equator in 2010! Icing on the cake: My South American counterpart and I will be exchanging homes as well as our teaching jobs, and dude gots a swimming pool. Before the conference call, when Sweet Pickles was informed of this fact, guess what he did in his pants. Frosting on top of the icing on the cake: I didn't totally understand this part of the conversation (there were five of us around the speaker-phone on our end), but apparently my counterpart's home will come with a live-in handyman (or some kind of servant?). Sweet Pickles was thinking, "Uh, do you mean like, to take care of things and do shit around the house that I can't do??" Then, Sweet Pickles had to excuse himself to go change underwear and smoke an 'after' cigarette. Now, I ain't sayin' Sweet Pickles is a gold digger... but he ain't messin' with no broke faculty-exchanges! At this point, I think I may have flipped everyone in the meeting off, and said something to the effect of "Swimming pools and servants? Later, bitches! I'm out!"
Also, my counterpart and I will be doing a 'transportation exchange' as well. So if you spot a Latino driving Sexy Edward around town, wave! Unfortch, my counterpart's automobile is a standard (is that what you call the kind of car that's not automatic, where you have to jack around with the stick-shift?). At this point in the conference call, some smartass N-Lope made the observation that, even if the car was an automatic, Sweet Pickles still probably shouldn't be driving in a foreign country. True dat. N-Lope has ridden shotgun in Sexy Edward often enough to know that Sweet Pickles probably shouldn't be driving in the U.S. But, no worries... apparently, a taxi to campus only costs $1.00! And Sweet Pickles loves to be driven places!
The good news for my local peeps is that we're scheduling the exchange for 8 weeks during the summer of 2010. So, I won't be away long enough for you to start experiencing withdrawal symptoms. The bad news for my local peeps is that, obviously, Summer 2010 in O-Town is going to suck. Hard. If this thought is too unbearable for you, start pricing airfare for a visit to Latin America now. [When you get down there, we can swim in my pool!]
Special appreciation to my fineass boss for making this possible. She totally beats out all of my former bosses: Johnny Vasquez, Jack Mendel, Ueda-san, Nakajima-san, L'il Roy, J-Mur, the Bald Dwarf... even Hisaya's father (who made my first Japan experience possible)! Awww... thanks, slut. Love ya ;)
They're baaack!
This past weekend, the Lindas returned to the Lone Star state, safe and sound. Two weeks in New York, Boston, Halifax, Charlottetown, and Québec City is a whirlwind tour, but it always seems like a lonnnnng time to Daddy Pickles, Sissy Pickles, and me, whenever Mama Pickles is away from the nest for that many days. Mama Pickles was impressed with all the ports-of-call on their itinerary, but the only one she has definite plans to re-visit in the future is the Big Apple. She said, "If some people left their hearts in San Francisco, I left mine in New York!" I'm really pleased that she had a great first time there, and seems to love it as much as I do. Next time, we'll have to go together. The Lindas were talking up the idea of going back for a museum tour of NYC, with Sweet Pickles as their tour guide. Can you imagine taking Manhattan with this crew (pictured below at LaGuardia International)? It blows my mind that three of these started kindergarten together, and the other two joined them in junior high school. I hope this is how T-Bagg and Brad Bagby and Wipey and I will spend our retirement!
13 October 2009
Oh, snap!
Frenchie just sent me this gem. I plan to use it as the title slide in the lecture I do called "I Don't Get It."
12 October 2009
09 October 2009
08 October 2009
"Look out, weekend... here I come!"
It looks like this weekend is shaping up to be pretty awesome. JustJess and I are planning some more daytime drinking in her carport tomorrow afternoon. And M-Dev told his today that he's going out tomorrow night, which indeed makes for a special occasion. And according to Facebook, it looks like Brookles' coolest out-of-state friend is coming in to town for the weekend. So, after JustJess and I get things started right, maybe everyone can meet up at Snackbar for fun times?
Saturday, I've got a ticket to see David Sedaris (who I still cannot believe is coming to town) on Saturday night. Then, it's off to a birthday party for my favorite Brazilian! How much more fun could possibly be packed in to 48 hours?!?!
05 October 2009
Enough Already (Again)
I had a very nice weekend, until Sunday. A relaxing Friday evening... stayed in, ate my favorite nachos for dinner, and read. Saturday was a spontaneous daytrip in to the Bluff City with M-Shan and D-Hug. We listened to D-Hug's This Ain't No Disco mix that she burned for me (get yours at WCFC while supplies last!), had Ethiopian food for lunch, joked about buying 'quinn-noah' at the hippie grocery store and about buying thongs at Old Navy. Met friends at Snackbar that night for drinks. Then sometime Sunday morning, rolled over in bed to hear rain outside. Again. All day. All night. And still today. My whole Monday was off... my mood was just shot. It's too early in the fall for it to be this chilly, this wet, and this dark for this long. The whole month of September has looked and felt like January. And to add insult to injury, it's supposed to be like this until NEXT Sunday! That will make it a full month with less than a week of sunshine. I just can't. I'm starting to think I should be pursuing a faculty-exchange in Dubai.
On a totally unrelated note: When I logged in to Typepad a few minutes ago, this was their Question of the Day:
Reagan had bowls full of jelly beans; Obama, M&M's. If you were elected President, what would you choose as the official White House candy?
I can't decide whether mine would be Jordan Almonds or Maple Nut Goodies. What would yours be?
02 October 2009
30 September 2009
29 September 2009
27 September 2009
Ahhh, the sweet non-taste of Atonement!
Praying in the Synagogue on Yom Kippur. Maurycy Gottlieb. Oil on canvas. 1878. Tel Aviv Museum of Art.
26 September 2009
The Lindas Take Manhattan!
In about an hour and a half, Mama Pickles and four of the Lindas will be touching down at LaGuardia. Every other year, this group takes a cruise together. This year's cruise of New England and the Maritime Provinces kicks off with four days in the New York! I think that the richest Linda has been to NYC before, but for the rest of them (including Mama Pickles), it will be their first bite of the Big Apple. And today is Mama Pickles' birthday! I can't think of a better way to celebrate than a sixty-somethings' version of Sex and the City with your oldest girlfriends (although I suspect they'll be drinking more Governors and Duchesses than Cosmopolitans, and shopping at Chico's or Talbots instead of Versace). I'm going to call her later tonight to wish her a happy birthday, and find out her first impressions of New York.
After New York, the girls board the ship for two weeks, with stops in places like Boston, Halifax, Prince Edward Island, and Québec City. While this one doesn't seem as interesting to me as their North Sea/Baltic or Mediterranean cruises, I know they're excited, and I'm excited for them. Even though I always feel slightly out-of-whack when Mama Pickles is away from home base for extended periods of time. You go, Lindas!
Just for fun.
One of my students had this cake posted on FB. I think that Shy Bunghole D-Hug would like it. When is that slut's birthday?
25 September 2009
A Bowl Full of Ass
is how Sweet Pickles feels right now. A potluck dinner with my former department at L-Hane's and K-Wad's place (in which I only ate beer for dinner), then patio wine-drinking at T-War's, and now I'm headed in to a 3-hour string of back-to-back classes. I think that, for this semester, I've just proved to myself that Thursdays cannot be that thirsty. I'm gonna have to do my midweek drinking on Wednesdays, since I don't have to teach until 4:00pm on Thursdays.
P.S. - The weather isn't helping. Anybody else had enough of this shite yet? I was over it two weeks ago.
23 September 2009
Ya know who I love?
Texas' senior-Senator-cum-gubernatorial-candidate, Kay Bailey Hutchison! I've always been a fan, and so much want her to become the next governor of my home state. I don't know all the details, but apparently our current governor is a bit of a douchebag (that's what happens when you let a Texas A&M alumnus into the Governor's Mansion for the first time in the history of statehood. Just think... in the dome of the Capitol's rotunda in Austin, there will now hang an official portrait of an Aggie. Abomination!).
For those of you who didn't like George W. Bush, you'd loathe Rick Perry. [But if you like Giorgio, you'll love Primo!] If John McCain had been serious about wanting to win the White House, no one would even know the name of Sandra Poland, and today we might be talking about the country's first female VP. Not to diminish the impact of our first African-American presidency, but her candidacy could have been a realistic shot at breaking a barrier no matter which ticket won the 2008 presidential election.
And just look at her. She is the quintessential picture that comes to mind when you hear the words "the senator from Texas"... both senatorial and Texan. I admit, I am partial to the look... she resembles most of the Lindas. Not that appearances should matter. Who am I kidding? I doubt that you could look like Barbara Mikulski, Carl Levin, or Patty Murray, and get elected governor of the Lone Star state (we're attracted to the attractive, don't judge!), so let's be real. But Kay is from Galveston (Mother City of the Republic) and a former cheerleader at the University of Texas. What else could Texas possibly want in a governor that has a snowball's-chance-in-hell of being elected? Go Kay, go!
22 September 2009
I've lost count.
But I want it to stop. I'm tired of the sight of it, the sound of it, the smell of it, the taste of it, and the feel of it.
21 September 2009
20 September 2009
In case you hadn't noticed...
it's still raining. Five days ago, I was pissed off enough already to post about how much it had been raining. And it hasn't stopped since then. Guess what kind of mood I'm in now.
19 September 2009
18 September 2009
CURRENTLY LISTENING
CURRENTLY READING
BLOGGERS I KNOW
OTHER BLOGS I READ
- Aliyah! Step-by-Step: Making a Life in Israel
- Cake Wrecks
- Cousin Lucy's Spoon
- Dlisted | Be Very Afraid
- Engrish.com
- Go Fug Yourself
- lowercase L
- Overheard in New York | The Voice of the City
- Passed Out Photos - Drunk Shaming Pics
- Shabot 6000
- Stuff Jewish Young Adults Like
- Stuff Nobody Likes
- Stuff White People Like
- The "Blog" of "Unnecessary" Quotation Marks
- White Stuff People Like
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